I’ve always been the type to share coding snippets and technical stuff here, but this is the first time I’m opening up about how I really feel. I’m...
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I went through a period of time where I was feeling fatigued and unmotivated. After sharing this with my doctor during an annual checkup, the results showed I had low vitamin D and lower testosterone than the prior year. Getting a vitamin D supplement and making an effort to lift weights helped to boost my energy and focus. This takes care of your baseline health but don’t underestimate the importance of social interactions.
It may also help to start exploring some new hobbies that are social to help break up your current routine and introduce you to new people.
On the career side, you may want to start speaking with some career coaches or just more senior leaders that can provide some mentorship. This should help you to get prepared for a new role and/or a promotion.
Hang in there and hopefully one of these avenues can help!
In general, getting a full blood panel from a doctor can be useful, including some other tests depending on your situation and where you live. I live in a rural area and so I got checked for Lyme disease, which can make you exhausted (among other things). I also got checked for EBV (commonly known as "mono") because that can also give you exhaustion.
There could be other things worth checking on depending on your situation. It can be really hard to work through without help (and even still WITH help!).
Thank you so much for your valuable advice ✨
I will take your advice, althought my annual checkup was a month ago and it came back just fine, although i still feel that something is missing and that weightlifting and perhaps going for a run in the evening sound really nice.
I agree with this. I would emphasize exercise (weights) and social. Also, try to do your hobbies before work. You're the most focused first thing so don't give that time to someone else.
You said the remedy to his problems because I too have a 9-5 job that's office-based not remote😭 runs through the weekdays and unfortunately (for now) isn't in the field I'm more comfortable with, that is, tech
Despite having a whole lot of my free time eaten by the job, I still manage to regularly post on my YT channel and work on my side projects(games and challenges) incrementally(small/big) by working on what matters to you more in the morning (right after you get up from bed) with that Sigma focus like everyday or invest multiple hours doing the weekends
Overall bro, the main goal is to be better everyday 🙂
Doesn't this mean that regular work will suffer as a result of not focusing on it first? If he is burnt out after work to do side project, wouldn't this indicate that after devoting 2 hours of side project work in the beginning one would lose 2 hours of productivity for the regular work?
You have a point tho
A weekly schedule on how days have different priorities in order to achieve the said balance of both worlds 🤔
I've been doing this IT stuff (Linux Sysadmin Webdeveloper, PHP-Developer,...) for about 20 years now and in the last years I didn't have so much time for any side projects because family is the most valuable and important thing nowadays. I would give you the advice to use your free time to meet people, friends and / or family. Companies / tools / frameworks will change much more often than people you care about.
It is easy to go fast and do a lot when you're young and think it will keep going on. But we all change. The unfortunate truth is that we all have a limited mental juice. So doing extra work is okay sometimes, but it always comes with a cost: eventually you need time to recover.
So get yourself possibilities to rest, and especially sufficient amount of time away from doing anything. I mean literally anything: not watching a video, not reading news or articles, not reading a book. Just simply let your brains have a moment. This is easiest to do if you can get into a silent enough place, and human mind tends to like nature the best. Also learn to enjoy being bored for a while. Bored now equals productive later.
Even little daily things help out: allow yourself to have moments during work time that you don't really do anything productive. It is totally okay not to be doing stuff continuously. Learn to have breaks. Unproductive days are also okay, they will eventually happen. They're the cost days when you pay for being (over) productive in the other ones.
Learning not to stress and to not get frustrated when being unable is a good skill to learn. It makes it easier to become or stay able and energetic. And of course mental health overall is a good thing to maintain. We're not pure logic balls we pretend to be, feelings are what keep us going.
Then of course there's all the standard eat and sleep healthy, make sure you do enough physical activity, all that will help out in maintaining mood and good energy levels.
I think part of it is the “need” factor as opposed to the “want”. It doesn’t seem like you “need” to work on side projects so when the weekend comes around, there isn’t an incentive to do that work… and that’s completely fine! I’ve been in mental ruts like that and there just wasn’t enough pressure to take action. In fact, sometimes I’ve only started working on side projects when I get sick of procrastinating on them - that’s the pressure kicking in. I wonder if others agree, but I think it’s as simple as that - we have pretty nice jobs, we make more than the median income (usually) so working on side projects is just not as motivating… which again is totally fine and makes sense! But it’s good to be aware that you’re not doing anything wrong, there’s just not enough pressure or actual “need” to build outside of work sometimes 🤷
To me, it sounds like burnout: getting overworked and not having much time to do what you want to do outside of work.
Everyone has their own way of navigating challenging situations, and here's how I managed mine:
Back in my college days, I had a packed schedule. I worked from 8 am to 6 pm, attended classes until 11 pm, and when I finally got home, instead of resting, I’d dive into unpaid overtime for my job. The sprints were intense, filled with urgent tasks that would pop up out of nowhere. On top of that, I had to juggle studying, homework, and presentations for college. It was overwhelming, to say the least.
The best advice I can give you is to see a psychiatrist if possible. If you can afford a session every 15 or 30 days, I highly recommend it. Therapy helped me so much in understanding what was really going on inside me, and that understanding gave me the clarity to take steps towards my happiness.
For me, one of those steps was changing companies. I realized my previous job wasn’t making me happy anymore. I had been there for eight years, and while I thought I was part of something amazing, it turned out I wasn't as valued as I believed. When I resigned, all they said was, “Good luck,” without any effort to keep me. But it was a blessing in disguise! In my new role, I was earning double, with half the pressure. I even had the energy to work on side projects, contribute to open source, and mentor junior developers. The best part? I was doing better in college and didn’t have to work overtime anymore.
Amazingly, after just a year in that job, I moved to an even better one. “But why leave such a great company?” you might wonder. Well, as good as it was, I found a company that fit my needs even better—better policies, a fun product to work on, a higher salary, remote work, and more. One thing I learned is that no company will meet 100% of your expectations, and that’s okay. But there’s always a better opportunity out there—one that aligns more with your goals, work style, and values. So, keep searching! Do your research, ask questions on LinkedIn, and make sure the company knows exactly what you're looking for during interviews.
Lastly, don’t forget to take care of yourself. Whether it’s exercising, going to doctors, therapy, spending time with friends, or working on a personal project over the weekend—do what makes you happy, even if it’s just recharging on your own.
I hope my story encourages you and helps in some way. Wishing you all the best!
hey bro it's ok to not be productive all the time, you never know what can happen tomorrow so don't worry about it you are still an individual with skills and that will never be erased, when the moment comes to learn or make something new then you'll know that it's worth it because it ignited the inspiration back in you, so don't sweat it you'll be fine it happens to the best of us and it's completely normal
also the world we live in kinda forces us to feel like this because of production focused upbringings, it's ok to just chill sometimes
Just like you, I used to worry about this. But going to the the gym changed everything:
You don'thave to be a hustler, life is not Instagram, take it easy.
I share same experience.
I was working with a company managing a couple of apartments as an AirBnB property Manager and host. Yes the job was taking care of my bills and more and my bosses were happy with my effort but I was over working myself. At first I didn't realize it. I was just working and trying to please my client and be productive.
I handled the business as if it was mine.
We were a small team. While my bosses focused on other aspects of the business, I was handling bookings, maintainance, social media, customer relationship (enquires and complains), financial reports, among others.
I was putting in the hours, for the 2years and 4months I worked with them, I never had a holiday nor break. I worked even during the weekends and on holidays. My phone was always active and I cannot silent it even at night because I need to always respond to calls to guests.
I did all these but never asked for a raise nor overtime. I saw it as an opportunity to learn. But then I was hurting myself.
I have been trying to learn Full Stack web development, but I always never could. Whenever I wanted to learn, there must always be a disruption. The only time I could squeeze out to learn was early mornings between 4am and 7am. But then most times I coundn't as instead I will just sleep.
Because I knew there would be disruption, whenever I had free time during the day, I will end up watching NetFlix.
I became overly fraustrated and depressed. I couldn't take it anymore. Towards the end of last year I noticed it affected my productivity and my relationships.
As an introvert too, I found it hard to speak to someone or to seek professional help. I kept my issues to myself and my journal.
Then I decided to quit and just focus on my dream of becoming a Software developer.
So I informed my bosses on first week of December last year, and gave the 6months to get someone to replace me (The company ended up employing 4 people to handle the workload I was handling) and then I left the company the end of last May and took a month off to clear my head before now studying full time.
I suggest you have a talk with the company if possible and discuss your situation. If they are interested in your well being they will understand.
Take sometime off work (some days) and disappear to a place where all you do is reflection and healing. Detach yourself from your phone during this period.
From my experience, you will get back your productivity and drive to focus on your personal projects and stuff.
I empathize with this soooo hard.... I'm not a professional developer, just a hobby one. But even then I've fallen into ruts. What I've found is that I use programming as a creative outlet. Which is fine, but that means its inspiration driven. I find myself riding waves of inspiration which creates waves of productivity when I'm on. However, the valleys I fall into creates almost a catatonic state of staring at the keyboard and screen and doing nothing. I've learned to identify these periods, call them for what they are, and fight to find the next spark of inspiration.
You're an engineer. Happiness and life satisfaction requires just as much careful thought and engineering as any program.
You know something isn't right, now do some engineering. Identify the problem and then decide on the best way to solve it for this context, then execute. Iterate if it doesn't work! Identify the issues, then execute again, and again, and again.
Sometimes we don't have all the answers. That's where we turn to experts. If you don't have the answers you need, look to a doctor or therapist perhaps. A mentor in the field perhaps?
Once you know the problem, you can work on solutions to fix it! If they seem impossible, ask yourself if they are indeed impossible, or rather just very large and long timelines to fix? If so, make a plan, start executing, and look for ways to accelerate that timeline.
You got this!
It took me a LOT of therapy and talking to people and acceptance and reading on things to figure stuff out for me. I hope you figure it out for you much faster than I did!
Feel free to ask any questions if I can help!
hey, sad to read this.
I don't know your situation to stay with that startup, but for me it's a big mistake from the founders/managers to leave you in that state.
Keep in mind that at the end of the day it's just a job and you shouldn't put yourself throw all that, affecting your personal life for a paycheck.
If you haven't already, try to discuss with them this issue and that you won't be able to continue that way for long.
Burn outs need to be taken very seriously.
Take care of yourself 🙏
12 years i'm freelance. It's absolutely normal to feel tired and lazy at some point.
Personnal projects are cool and exciting, but sometimes, that is not the time...
Things i'm trying to do to stabilize my mood : sports (3-5 hours per week), going outside for a walk, playing music, lunch with some friends during the week...
But first of all : I don't work in the evening and surely not during the weekend. It's a strong No go.
Reach out to find friends who are interested in building your project and collaborate together. Your partner will be a source of motivation when you're tired or feeling lazy. It's not easy, but we have to acknowledge that it's hard to succeed alone.
Stay busy and motivated by exploring new opportunities. If your current job isn't providing opportunities to update your skills, consider making a change. Stagnation can negatively impact your future job prospects, so don't get stuck in a company that's not investing in your growth. Alternatively, try freelancing or creating coding videos to diversify your experience and stay engaged. Remember, it's essential to continually develop your skills to remain competitive in the industry
Hi buddy, I know you may not have a lot of money on the table now, but I suggest going to psychotherapy. You may have something like that mild ADHD. I have side by side with diabetes, so it's better to evaluate your health status first or any other mild stuff you may figure out you have. I don't know if migraines is truly diagnosed or not yet, but you'll get better if you take care of health things; you'll be better; you only need some time, believe me you will be back to your zone, hope this comment helped you.
Working an extra 2 hours a day on top of your regular job which is already too demanding is not a good idea, I was in the same position as you, trying to do a lot but we only get limited hours each day and cannot do everything every day. Weekends are best for working on side projects or spending an hour daily. This might help you.
In my opinion, you're not in a position to work on side projects right now, and things might only get worse. You should consider doing the opposite of what you usually do. For example, stop using a computer for a month, walk the Saint James Way, or go to Morocco, rent a motorcycle, and explore it for at least 20 days. Do something that pushes you out of your comfort zone. Pain and discomfort can help reset and refocus your mind.
PS. I didn't realize you're from India. It's a great country to explore, and you can do similar activities there, like taking a trip to the Himalayas.
I haven't had a paying gig for more than a year. The job market for good devs has dried up.
Most of the job openings are for overly specific lists of experience they seem unable to understand that I'd rather work with actual talented developers than people with six years of experience in framework X instead of Z, Q and P never mind that 90% of using a framework is understanding HTML and CSS and JavaScript/Typescript.
The last few projects I've worked on had insane politics too. I used to get projects where I could have some say on how it was being done, now the projects have had terrible architectural decisions and a culture of yes men, and they shoot the messenger of any bad news about the problems their decision and for that matter lack decisions were causing.
Totally understood. This can and will happen in this industry, particularly when you are in a space of having to do extra overtime and you are only doing it for the pay.
First, see a Dr. and maybe even a therapist. You could be dealing with a number of issues that can be dealt with using the right medications to get you back on track.
You could be experiencing depression, burnout (often fixed with the same treatments as depression), or a host of other issues (such as the vitamin d deficiency the other person mentioned).
You'll eventually find a spot you fit into better and you will find time to work on hobbies and side projects. Then life will happen and you won't have time again, then things will lighten up and you will have time again. Life tends to work in cycles like this where you will be exposed to extreme circumstances. Your job during these times is to find the best ways to mitigate these circumstances so you get stronger and so you can help others through them later. Then, when life opens up again for you (will rarely open up as much as you'd like, but things do periodically get better), try to take as much advantage of it as possible. Try and build up some stuff that will help offset the pain of the next time life sends you a curve ball.
Best of luck to you.
It was almost as if you wrote a story of my life in this post! You are most definitely not alone in this situation you are finding yourself in.
Have I found a solution that works? Not even close! I honestly think with the rat race we have been getting accustomed too in the Software Development space has sped up so much, that our mental capacity has reached that point where enough is enough.
Another issue is, that our side projects need more time and effort to get to a state that we can proudly show it to the world! But family and responsibilities are no longer allowing us the time to achieve those goals!
A solution would be to find someone with the same passion for the project as you have to collaborate. Almost like a gym accountability partner. However if you are in the same boat as me! Most other people do not put in the same quality thought and work into a project as one would expect. Thus only causing another project to stagnate and die.
I feel you man! Let me know if someone has a solution!
You are not alone. Every advice given by the fellow colleagues in the comments are golden.
Take care of your body so it can give you the energy to build stuff. I also have a problem with vitamin D and Fe, feeling tired all the time... But as we are biological machines, we need to give our body and mind what it wants - exercise, good food and social interactions. Like our servers needing maintenance, our body needs it too.
Reality is that non-tech people don't give a damn about our development processes and struggles, they just see the end result. So, my advice is to not overthink and overengineer your ideas, keep it simple and define an ending - finish it and publish it, no matter the quality or complexity. I learned this the hard way, as an IT entrepreneur.
Best of luck, soldier!
I just went through the same thing a few months ago, it's not the first time but in my case it usually gets solved when I create a new purpose for myself, something unrelated to what I'm currently doing or love to do. During this period people would tell me to go out, and go to the gym but those are things I really don't enjoy, however,by chance my brother had a project, building a chicken coup for about 30 chickens and he asked for my help, I said yes because I needed something different. Long story short I found myself really enjoying the gritty work and my mind always referring everything back to programming, We negotiated for materials, had random conversations with strangers passing by, had drinks at the end of the night, and when I came back home after a week, I felt really elated and ready to dive back into my work. If you can find something similar that works for you I think it might help. I call it THE WEEKEND IKIGAI. I hope this helps.
I have been a developer for almost 5 years and I had the same experience at first. So, I would like to share my thoughts and observations. It is common for startup companies not to pay well or on time, yet you have to overwork most days. Believe it or not, this is one of the main reasons for your stress. You're tired, but you still work beyond your exhaustion. Not getting enough money on time, and your bills are overdue, putting immense pressure on you. You have no money in your pocket, your health is suffering, and your mind is not clear. You cannot focus because your mind is full of many things at once. You are burning out time and time again. My advice? Change your job. Change it now. Changing jobs when your career has just started can be beneficial. In the first 2-3 years, change 2-3 jobs, staying at least 7-8 months in each so your resume does not look bad. As you change jobs, you will be able to increase your salary little by little, gain different experiences, and grow your confidence. Then, you'll want to go even higher with better pay and a better company. In a few years, assuming you might face the same kind of startup company which is normal when you don't have much experience, you'll be in a position with much better mental health, and able to manage your time better. You still may have to overwork sometimes, but not every day and not the same experience. I hope this helps you.
I experience similar in phases. I did in other professions also. It's me, just comes sometimes. Don't be passive in it, but kind of keep things in your stream when unable to spend time on them.
And make attempts to start back up. Use the 5 minute rule, commit to spending 5 minutes reviewing the projects and let your mind wander around them open ended. Walk away when you need to because surely you met your commitment of 5 minutes by now.
Best of luck.
If you have to really push yourself to do something you may not really like it that much? Or it's a part of the project that you don't like all that much.
Both can be a blocker. One means pick something else to do. The other means: push through the hard parts so you can get back to the fun stuff.
Or if you can reorganize things: there's top down development, bottom up development, and fun down development. Start with a part of it you want to do to get going.
It has its limitations. At some point you just need to power through the unpleasant stuff or you have a bunch of forever unfinished projects.
You have to put a high value on completion.
Also it's not easy to have something be your job and your hobby. For me I do computer programming sometimes as my hobby. But it's purely in retro computing domain and I don't do death march sized projects.
If you can't find something like that maybe find a different hobby. Something completely different like woodworking, fitness, etc.
It's better to rely on discipline rather than motivation. Start small and set aside as little time as you can, and build from there.
I went through one of your Memorable Password Generator in notchtools.com
It breaks the frontend when I try to enter special symbols.
I hope you get it fixed soon to make it usable (I think it's enough to motivate a developer) ❤️
Like a few others have mentioned, you described how I am feeling to a T in my career, though I don't actually work in tech.
I've considered it being Low T, mono, adhd, vitamin D. I've wondered if it was burnout or the effects of long Covid and to be honest, I haven't figured it out either.
I think it's burnout, but I think it may be due to being susceptible to burnout, maybe as a result of being an introvert or the work from home lifestyle. I wonder if the constant sitting in front of the screen is what does it.
What I can say is that it does help when I force myself to take long walks alone without my phone in my face. Also, getting extra sleep every night and staying hydrated.
Good luck figuring it out.
I had a similar problem, try taking a walk or going to gym after your main work and then try side projects if this doesn't seem help check it medical wise. I did a full blood test found bunch of vitamin deficiencies, after fixing vitamins and my diet, my workouts have improved working two jobs and doing side hustle projects and now my will to live is pumped again!
9-5 if it isn't interesting seems like a waste of time this starts to kills your energy after a while (just going for money isn't enough)
i feel you
Put the phone down mate and stop any infinite scrolling to start.
All the best, you will get there.
as a developer into the small startup The same happening with me
Thanks for sharing something so personal and vulnerable! I hope you get through this. I am going through the same struggles as well :/
Thanks for sharing! I'm mid level career, and I totally feel this way. Hope things get better!! All the best!
This is a symptom of being overwhelmed. Write one goal and three simple steps towards it - that will get you moving, and out of this rut. Just keep the momentum!
The hardest part is the first step. Once you take it, things get a lot easier.👏
Going through that phase right now and i mainly started programming because of it, but now i don't know where my time and energy gone
I resonate with what you shared about struggling with burnout despite having flexible hours. Many developers go through similar challenges when balancing a full-time job with personal projects. It's important to find joy in creating again and give yourself space to rest without guilt. Taking small steps toward your personal projects, without pressure to make them perfect, could help ease you back into your creative zone.
Also, if you're feeling stuck, exploring new avenues like DevOps training could reignite your passion. DevOps offers a holistic approach to software development and operations, which can broaden your skills and potentially give you new motivation. Keep pushing through, even if it's slow progress. You've already accomplished so much, and it's clear that you have the drive to get back to what you love.