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Marwa-Hodeib
Marwa-Hodeib

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When Will I Become A Developer!!

When will I become a developer, a question I ask my self every day since I started my career in coding, and today, I woke up, and said to myself, I will write a blog about it, my first blog, maybe this will help me and someone else who feels the same!

What brought me to tech you ask? well it is a semi long story, so here you go…
It all started when I was a young girl, who was so curious about the code behind the machine my father and my mother built with their bare hands, the machine was beautifully engineered, and it is very simple too, we called it “The Rainbow Maker”, you just place it outside in a sunny day, and put any flat white surface under it, and then you will see a rainbow 🌈 on the white surface 😍 how did this work? well simply, we fill half the container inside the machine with water, and since it has glass on the outer part, it takes sunlight and bends it and separates it so we can see the rainbow any time we had a sunny day!

So your parents were scientists and engineers, and you’re a straight A student with a house full of physics and scientific discussions you ask?
Well…ummmmmm, not exactly and the story about “The Rainbow Maker”
is definitely not a real story!
I told you this story because whenever I proudly say when someone asks me what I do for a living and I answer, I am a Software Developer, they always assume that I definitely had this kind of childhood , but the truth is it was never like that, I was always struggling at school, and my parents had nothing to do with engineering or science, and our house was not a place that was full of physics and scientific discussions, it was a house that was full of abuse, and that’s another story, and when I proudly answer I am a Software Developer, no one knows why I am so proud, I am proud because it took me a very long way to be where I am today, I am not a scientist, yet, or an engineer, yet, I am just a junior frontend developer, who is trying to figure out how on earth does a loop work!

So after struggling in school, and hating anything related to something scientific, I went to a technical institute which I originally wanted to study plane engineering, because maybe I wanted to prove to myself that I am smart, but at that time they wouldn’t allow girls to study it and they made me choose between the girly stuff they had, so I chose to study Interior Design, long story short, I failed that too, and then I quit school and started looking for jobs to help my family, until I found a photography course, started it, studied and fell in love with photography, and made a fifteen years career out of it!!

Photography was something I loved, and I learned a lot over the years, but then I felt like the neurons are dying in my brain, I reached a stage where I have nothing new to learn, especially after fulfilling my dream, which was taking photos with my idol, and him telling me how good I am as a photographer, meanwhile I never got close to anything related to tech, although my brother and his wife started a career in tech, and they told me how magical it is, and that made me think that maybe I should try it, and try to challenge my brain after 15 years of not getting any new information, except for the information I get from articles and movies and documentaries I see about astronomy and physics.

I found a beautiful boot camp to study coding, I ditched my photography career, and went on this journey. As soon as I started, it felt like I finally belong somewhere, and that my brain cells are glowing and everything around me started to look pink, I even heard the song La Vie En Rose echoing every time I opened the laptop(turned out it was on repeat and I didn’t notice), my colleagues are talking something that I totally understand, people are helpful whenever I need to ask something, in real life or on social media or any place, I even started understanding coding related memes!!!

Even though I am completely satisfied by having a career in coding, I never stop asking myself or my dear friend who helps me every day when I am coding, When Will I Become A Developer?? He always says you are a developer, but I never believe him, and I keep questioning myself if I am a developer, or if am I even qualified to say that I am, but here I am, I wake up every day, open my laptop hear the song La Vie En Rose echoing through my laptop, work as a developer, study new things every day, get one percent better at loops every time I try one, learn how to think when I face a problem, get frustrated when I find a bug, get excited that I solved it, understand freaking flex behaviour, sleep, and do it again the second day, and so well, maybe I am a developer after all!!!

I don’t know if I will ever fully believe that I am developer, but I am proud of the journey I went through and go through every day, I am proud that I still didn’t give up, I will keep learning and getting better every freaking day!!!!
And if I could do it, you definitely can too!

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