DEV Community

Nevertheless, Ali Coded

Ali Spittel on March 06, 2020

Trigger Warning: graphic sexual content, racism, sexual harassment Nevert...
Collapse
 
peter profile image
Peter Kim Frank

These messages are infuriating, disgusting, and awful.

I admire your strength for pushing on and inspiring so many others despite this constant stream of harassment. 💜

Thank you for sharing the ugly truth about what it means to be a prominent woman in tech. It's an important (if not disturbing) wake-up call to anyone out there who refuses to recognize that this sort of awful harassment goes on every single day.

Collapse
 
aspittel profile image
Ali Spittel

💜

Collapse
 
torianne02 profile image
Tori Crawford • Edited

This was such a difficult thing to read as a woman who has dealt with sexual harassment as well.

What makes me really upset is the screenshots are from essentially every platform (Twitter, Gmail, LinkedIn, etc.). A woman isn't safe from a man's unwanted passes on anything nowadays. It's ridiculous and I'm sorry that you have to deal with this nonsense. I applaud you for being so strong and continuing to create amazing content for those of us who love hearing and learning from you despite all this unwanted attention year after year. You are an amazing person, Ali. Don't let anyone ever let you think otherwise.

Collapse
 
aspittel profile image
Ali Spittel

❤️

Collapse
 
emmabostian profile image
Emma Bostian ✨

Love you for posting this!

Collapse
 
aspittel profile image
Ali Spittel

❤️

Collapse
 
ridhwana profile image
Ridhwana Khan

Wow, I'm so sorry that all of this happened to you. These messages are appalling 😞 Nevertheless, you coded.... and you're doing amazingly!

Collapse
 
aspittel profile image
Ali Spittel

❤️

Collapse
 
xanderyzwich profile image
Corey McCarty • Edited

Did I just witness a seizure stroke amidst erotic role play? All of this is terrible, but I can't get that one out of my head. Not only is it absolutely disgusting to send that unsolicited, but I'm seriously concerned for the brain that strung those words together.

Collapse
 
aspittel profile image
Ali Spittel

He sent a different version of the erotica to one of my close friends too, so bizarre.

Collapse
 
xanderyzwich profile image
Corey McCarty

can we raise money to get all of these guys an intro to grammar book?

Thread Thread
 
pauladozsa profile image
Paula

more like an "intro to how to be a decent human being" book

Collapse
 
codemouse92 profile image
Jason C. McDonald

Ahh, the annual rogue's gallery of terrible comments. Thanks for posting this, as always. It's terrible that so many bigots exist...but at least you're able to turn them around and use them to educate the rest of the world that gender discrimination DOES exist today in tech.

Collapse
 
michaeltharrington profile image
Michael Tharrington

This is a seriously disappointing collection of disrespectful, demeaning, and downright gross comments. 😞

Thanks for bringing this up and sharing your experience!

People really need to be reminded about the reality of what it's all too frequently like to work in this industry as a female developer. Thanks for persevering through this hate.

Collapse
 
vickilanger profile image
Vicki Langer

😭😩😡😡😢😢🤢🤮😡😭😭😭😢🤬🤬

Such an important thing to share. Why do people think this is okay?! I hope this will help show people this is a real thing that happens. I’m so sorry it happened at all.

Collapse
 
jmfayard profile image
Jean-Michel 🕵🏻‍♂️ Fayard • Edited

Well well well.

If I was the author of one of those shameful messages, I would be really grateful that you took the time to blurry my name when you had the option to show my cowardice to the world. And I would contact you to say that I'm sorry and will try hard to not be stupid in the future.

And to the dudes working at Twitter, Reddit and other fake "social" platforms where this shit is endemic:

Hey guys, are you not embarassed to be part of this? What the fuck are you waiting for? Stop with the excuses. Voice your opinion internally until they do something. Or fire you. And then write about it.

Collapse
 
andy profile image
Andy Zhao (he/him)

Appreciate you sharing this ❤️

Collapse
 
aspittel profile image
Ali Spittel

❤️

Collapse
 
yaser profile image
Yaser Al-Najjar

OMG!
The ugly side of humans... or non-humans 😶
I wish this never kills your motivation or (your why) to keep excelling.

Collapse
 
zubairmohsin33 profile image
Zubair Mohsin

More power to you Ali 🙌🏼💪🏻

Collapse
 
copperbeardy profile image
Davin Davies

common decency seems to be missing in the world of social media. sry to hear you and other people have to put up with these kinds of messages.

I hope you continue being you and don't let these people get at you.

Collapse
 
cydstumpel profile image
Cyd

It just goes on and on 😢

Collapse
 
xananax profile image
Xananax

Holy potatoes. As a cis dude, I hear about that stuff and read a few examples here and there, which are already puzzling/disgusting/worrisome, but seeing such a volume laid out is something else.

I don't know how I would deal with this without seizures. Kudos for the resilience and managing to keep some faith in humanity.

Collapse
 
jeaninehoffman profile image
Jeanine Hoffman

I have no words for how disgusting humans are and how glad I am that you are still here, coding, teaching, and inspiring. Keep up the great work and keep calling out trash humans!

Collapse
 
seangwright profile image
Sean G. Wright

I appreciate you taking the time out of your day to continue putting yourself out there, helping others learn, and being a positive voice in the dev community!

All of this in spite of the garbage and harassment you have to deal with regularly.

Thank for sharing your experiences and thanks for what you do, Ali! 🙏🙏🙏👍👍👍💪💪💪

Collapse
 
alchemist09 profile image
Luke

Reading the entire thread of messages, 98% which are about unwarranted and extremely annoying sexual advances just left me shocked and disgusted at how low people can get. The other 2% which borders on doubting your knowledge/expertise, best exemplified by the guy who asked if you can explain OOP in Python well, is even worse because while the bulk of messages you receive are awkward sexual comments from sexual predators, a far larger number of people, have this unconscious bias of doubting women's ability and competence even when they aren't predators themselves which is really sad. But I'm most impressed by your resolve to keep going. If that huge gang of human degenerates can't break your spirit, definitely, nothing else can.

Collapse
 
dmakogon profile image
David Makogon • Edited

These messages are brutal to read, one of them far more graphic than what is typically shared publicly. I can't even imagine reading them as the targeted recipient. Nobody deserves this.

Thank you for opening up and sharing.

Collapse
 
darksmile92 profile image
Robin Kretzschmar

Thank you for compiling this list again this year! Same as last year, I was amused at first, then I questioned the education of certain countries and then I got upset by the fact how demanding it must be as woman to get those kind of messages in this frequency.

Keep going and stay strong 💪🏾 😊

Collapse
 
katnel20 profile image
Katie Nelson

I’ve dealt with messages like yours recently on some coding chat sites. It usually scares them away when I reveal how old (or I should say young) I am. It’s the ones who keep at it after that which worries me.

Sounds like you can handle them well and I should take lessons from you.

Collapse
 
dhwanitshah profile image
Dhwanit Shah

I am so sorry you have to put up with this. Reading through these was infuriating and I'm just an outside observer. My wife was the most talented programmer I knew, but after working at three different companies where she repeatedly had to keep proving she was a damn good at what she did while also being a woman, she switched to a less male dominated industry. It is absolute bullshit that this still happena in 2020. You are far too kind to redact their names. Please keep up the good work, and don't let these socially inept chuckleheads get you down.

Collapse
 
triptych profile image
Andrew Wooldridge

Thank you for posting this. I can't imagine how horrible the ones are that you declined to add here. Don't let these folks discourage you! For every creepy creeper there are folks who also just want to build cool things using code and I hope you keep posting great content. I have a daughter who's trying to get into a tech related field as well and I cringe when I think about the kinds of things she will face as well. Seeing posts like this fighting back gives me hope for her as well.

Collapse
 
mustafaanaskh99 profile image
Mustafa Anas

I ...
I am just sorry.
I had a discussion a year ago with friends about how women are strategically and intentionally abused and pushed away from the field by men. I agreed to some extent but I could never guess it is that bad.
I am really sorry for you.

Collapse
 
rogerthecoder profile image
Roger

I sincerely appreciate your decision to voice your experiences out.
It saddens me deeply to realize what women go through just for being in a certain profession. It is truly unfortunate for such events to happen. Such behavior stands as a manifestation of disgust and filth.

The lack of respect their actions display is a lot disturbing. Such people should be evicted from social media platforms. I think they've confused free speech with personal vandalism and disrespect. I truly long for a time in which legislative provisions are made in favor of protection of personal dignity on social media platforms.

I must again salute the courage you and other women going through similar experiences show on a daily basis. Thank you for bringing it to public knowledge. We, men can never understand what women go through everyday but your expression has really made us realize how far we have fallen as a society that personal objectification has now become free real estate.

I hope everything stops one day, I will be trying my best for that day to come soon.

Thank you Ali.

Collapse
 
lautarolobo profile image
Lautaro Lobo

Damn, sick and scary af.

And nevertheless, she coded. You inspire many others to keep going, to keep writing, keep learning, even with all that shit, so thank you for that. ♥️

Collapse
 
mjcoder profile image
Mohammad Javed

Absolutely disgusting, I actually feel like I'm going to be sick. Absolutely nobody should have to put up with this kind of disgusting behaviour.

Keep on being awesome Ali! You're an inspiration to many!

WomenAreAwesome #TreatWomenWithRespect

Collapse
 
scott_sykora profile image
Scott Sykora

Oh Ali, I can't hardly believe such poor attitudes exist. Thank you for putting up with such garbage and being an encouragement to the coding community. Thanks for the help you have been for me in getting started in coding this year after surviving cancer. I have a copy of your book here, and have been using it as a guide. All the best!

Collapse
 
monicat profile image
Monica Macomber

What a horrible collection of messages! I had no idea that could happen on such a big scale, so sorry you have to put up with that.

You must be a very resilient person to keep doing what you do in spite of it. Thanks ❤️ we appreciate you.

Collapse
 
fionawhittington profile image
Fiona Whittington

Thank you for sharing! I admire your courage and resilience.

Collapse
 
ecsyoungcodes profile image
Sui

Oh good god.
Thank you for sharing, happy you're still coding.

Collapse
 
kylefilegriffin profile image
Kyle Griffin • Edited

Despite being blocked on Twitter, I do feel that even though you get way more disconcerting messages than any other female I know in tech (either because you're transparent or because you're you), you are appreciated very much by your carefully curated community. Anyone who isn't harassing you is very much appreciative of your easygoing twitter and hope that you don't let these men stop you from success.

Collapse
 
brianemilius profile image
Brian Emilius

I feel soiled now...
Thank you so much for posting this!
I hope I have never been that guy towards someone else. It makes me really think about how we choose to interact with other people.

... also, I'm sorry, but "your dress is the floor" made me go wtf?! and chuckle unbelievingly.

Collapse
 
ceeoreo profile image
Ceora Ford

Ali, I’m so so sorry all this has happened to you!!! I kept waiting for the screenshots to end but they kept going and I’m just devastated. I wish things weren’t this way. Thank you for continuing to code and teach and write despite all this horribleness!!

Collapse
 
talsmonkey profile image
Charl Marais

Well done for keeping your head up in spite of such a disgusting deluge of awfulness. I certainly would have decided it is not worth it long ago, so it really speaks to the strength of your character. Keep making the tech industry better the way you are doing right now.

Collapse
 
pidoxy profile image
Emmanuel Idoko

Reading this was sad and felt inhuman. I never really thought this happened or at least to this extent.

I hope you're in a better place now. Thanks for exposing me to this.

I don't know how but I hope I to assist the world in correcting some of these acts.

I admire your strength and courage.

Collapse
 
gautamkrishnar profile image
Gautam Krishna R • Edited

Seriously!.... 🤦 All these morons really exist?... What a good time to be alive.... Anyway just ignoring them is the best thing you can do. TBH I had seen sveral messages like this even in my mom's account, she's less tech savy so i manage her account sometimes. I usually block these s**** h*****.

Collapse
 
briant9tt profile image
Briant9tT

I can certainly understand how receiving inappropriate messages like that would be extremely uncomfortable and unsettling. As a victim of sextortion myself, I know firsthand how violating and traumatic it can be to have your personal boundaries violated in such a way. It's important to consider that we all have the right to feel safe in our online interactions, and it's never okay for someone to send inappropriate or harassing messages. It's understandable to feel upset and frustrated in a situation like this, and it's important to know that there are resources available to help support and protect you. If you ever feel unsafe or threatened online, don't hesitate to reach out to trusted friends, family, or organizations like the Digital Investigation and seek help.

Collapse
 
franprince profile image
Francisco Prince

I literally couldn't get myself to read every message, and I guess these are only some of them. I'm really sorry that you have to go through this.

Collapse
 
thatblairguy profile image
That Blair Guy

Ugh, I admire your strength in putting up with that. I truly hope the positive experiences have outweighed the negatives, but wow... This doesn't speak well of my gender.

Collapse
 
kaleigh profile image
kaleigh

This is an awful, yet a very real and true thing that women have to deal with online. I've received a tiny fraction of messages like these.

Thank you for bringing this to light ❤️.

Collapse
 
sushmagangolu profile image
Sushma Gangolu

You are amazing Ali Spittel. More power to you.

Collapse
 
sebs profile image
Sebastian Schürmann

I want to join the ranks of all the ranks of all well surprised and angered men about the different levels of harassment here, but being 'in the game' for 20 years, I find more of the young me in some of these postings than I probably would want to admit in every day life.

As with all issues of these regards (in short *isms) there is one point of view I want more men to take: Just don't declare yourself out of the problem, but try to find out how much of a problem you are (causing). If the answer is Zero: Think harder fellow Techbros. It is a very much more useful way of thinking than just declaring the problem is out of our hemisphere. Only then we have a chance to get over the 'all men are trash' meme (that exists for a obvious reason reiterated here).

Thanks for posting this and sorry you have to go through this.

Collapse
 
dougblackjr profile image
Doug Black

Yikes. I am so sorry for all this. :(

Collapse
 
syntaxseed profile image
SyntaxSeed (Sherri W) • Edited

Omg.
What.
This is so gross.
Thank you for publishing this & shining a light into the shadows.

Collapse
 
keithkurson profile image
keith kurson

Ali, thank you for sharing these & you're incredible and I hope you continue to write about coding online 💕

Collapse
 
zenulabidin profile image
Ali Sherief

You're a very brave coder, Ali, to withstand all these vile messages.

Collapse
 
justsharkie profile image
/*Sharkie*/

The tech world needed something like this. ❤

Thank you for sharing, and I'm so glad you've continued coding and writing about it online even with all those horrible things.

Collapse
 
cmanique profile image
Carlos Manique Silva

Gotta love the Christian one lol...
WTF is wrong with people :S

Just keep coding

Collapse
 
damien_perkins profile image
Damien Perkins

Absolute lowbreeds. Keep on keeping on.

Collapse
 
prasadsunny1 profile image
sunny prasad

No men or women in code deserves this.
Strange people....

Collapse
 
iftikhar profile image
iftikhar hussain

OMG, Too much fame, just because you have pretty face! Thank God i am not in the list

Collapse
 
max_tulian profile image
Max (he/his)

It’s a lot 😞

Collapse
 
shoiabakbar profile image
Shoaib Akbar

strong and brave girl. keep up

Collapse
 
panditapan profile image
Pandita

holy moly! Why are some men so 'agh' sometimes? I admire your dedication to programming despite all the crap you've received. You keep doing what you're doing cause you're doing awesome!! >:V

Collapse
 
jamestimmins profile image
James Timmins • Edited

These comments are terrible! I'm so sorry you have to deal with these. Thank you for sharing; as someone who hasn't experienced this firsthand, it's eye opening to see what it's like.

Collapse
 
shalini_jk profile image
Shalini

I'm really sorry that you receive such messages.
Much love and respect to you for staying motivated!

Collapse
 
outthislife profile image
Talasan Nicholson

I don't see why we're censoring the names of these people.

Collapse
 
archeelux profile image
Arturs Timofejevs

lmao what are some of those comments, straight from 2005 like. Sorry you have to go through with this type of harassment.

Collapse
 
will_the_dev profile image
Will Stewart

I expected it to end but it just didn't...and it kept getting worse the more I read.

Collapse
 
shaunagordon profile image
Shauna Gordon

Unfortunately, it would just as likely (and probably more likely) to put a target on her back for worse harassment and retaliation from these people as it would improve anything.

Collapse
 
adisreyaj profile image
Adithya Sreyaj

OMG...this is awful. I can't even imagine how difficult it would've been for you.

Keep coding...n more power to you!

Collapse
 
global_codess profile image
Faith Mueni Kilonzi

Reading this I can't help but admire your strength!
Keep on! 🤗🤗🤗

Collapse
 
jvarness profile image
Jake Varness

Is it me or is this all getting worse as time goes on??

Load o bullsh.

Collapse
 
lchausmann profile image
lchausmann

So sorry you had to be the recipient of all that trash.

Collapse
 
lucpattyn profile image
Mukit, Ataul

Great mental strength - overcoming all odds and making a name for yourself. Go Ali (y)

Collapse
 
marcusjohnson profile image
Marcus Johnson

Wow, this was a depressing read. You shouldn't be getting these messages at all. Stay strong and keep coding.

Collapse
 
jasmin profile image
Jasmin Virdi

These messages are really disgusting.
Thanks for posting this and making all of us aware of it. All this needs to stop, more power to you! 👍

Collapse
 
danielshow profile image
Daniel Shotonwa

These messages are disgusting.

Keep being strong and continue being amazing.

Collapse
 
chaos0815 profile image
Christian Wolf

To be fair, most seems off of Twitter that has driven grown men away in tears, so kudos for still being strong in that medium.

Collapse
 
tonetheman profile image
Tony Colston

Yeah ignore the garbage and just keep on working and posting!!!

Collapse
 
ewoks profile image
Beeblebrox • Edited

:((((((
f*cked up world we are living in...
I am sorry for all the women than need to fight with this crap and harassment everyday...
Don't let it - block and report asap

Collapse
 
superbuggy profile image
James Reichard

As always, your bravery and resilience are so admirable.

Collapse
 
jakwakwa profile image
Jaco Kotzee

Yikes!

Collapse
 
ctrleffive profile image
Chandu J S

People are strange 😔