DEV Community

Gabriela Muñoz
Gabriela Muñoz

Posted on


I lost my job, I am depressed.

On June 30 I lost my job. I couldn’t understand what happened.

As you know, I loved my job and I really enjoyed being part of the startup. I joined in 2020. I worked there for 2 years. I spent a lot of time working there, and I learned so much. Well, my status passed to unemployed. In the beginning I felt fine because I was exhausted. I had burnout. In the last months, my body was very tired.

I overslept for months, I didn’t go out, I didn’t talk with my parents and friends.
I was sad, and I felt humiliated because I didn’t know how to explain to my family that I lost my job. It was a failure for myself. But, one day, I decided to call my mom and tell her the situation. My family supported me, but they didn’t understand what happened, and they asked me “What are you doing now? I was like, I have no idea.

Then, I started looking for a new job. It was hard for me. I hadn’t done interviews in the past two years. With help from some friends, I started with my CV and I made a basic portfolio. Special thanks to Caro La Reclu IT because she was the first person to help me in this process.

Well, I began with interviews and I noticed my abilities and knowledge were not enough for the market. I improved myself and the way I took the interviews. I applied to many companies.I had the first and second interviews, but I didn’t continue in the process. That made me feel inadequate.

One day I saw this screenshot. I made it when I was practicing an English interview. At this moment I saw myself sad, tired, frustrated and depressed. I accept that I was depressed because I lost my job. It was a huge part of my day. I couldn’t see my team. I missed my daily routine.

Image description

Sometimes for me, it is impossible to wake up. In the last few months, my psychiatric treatment has changed every month, because I need energy to do my activities. My chairs have tons of clothes because I don’t have energy to organize. I’m trying to go out with friends and family. I’m trying to cook, not always healthy, but I eat something. I’m trying to play with my pet. She makes me happy.

Not only that, but I’m trying to forget that I lost my job, and I am worthwhile as a person. My heart is still broken. I am not sure when I will feel better. I do what I can to feel good and be happy.

Finally, I learned some key points. It’s ok if I:

  • Feel sad because I lost my job.
  • Do nothing because I don’t have energy.
  • Don’t clean my apartment.
  • Cry during the day.
  • Feel lost.

I continue with therapy and my psychiatric treatment. I can do more activities than in the past months. I went to Mexico City on vacation. This helped me to feel better. I’ve started smiling once again.

Image description

If you read the whole thing, thank you for your time. I am working to be my best.
Thank you, Technolatinas, friends and mentors that help me in this difficult moment.

Top comments (43)

ben profile image
Ben Halpern

Thanks for sharing. I just followed you on DEV, looking forward to supporting you.

chasm profile image
Charles F. Munat • Edited

FWIW, you have plenty of company. Hard times.

That said, many of your behaviors are actually making things worse, which just increases your burden and results in a downward spiral. If you want to get a job, you can't be depressed. People pick up on that subconsciously.

So you have to arrest the downward spiral and turn it around, spiraling up instead.

Clutter and a messy environment are really depressing, so the first thing to do is to spend a day really cleaning and neatening everything up. If you do so, I think that you'll find, sitting in your newly cleaned apartment, that you feel much better already.

Another big one is sitting around and feeling sad. That's no help at all. You can affect your hormonal balance with exercise and the outdoors. Get out and go for a brisk walk. Go somewhere nice -- a park or garden. Smell the roses. Pet a dog. Say hello to strangers.

Food, too. Instead of eating crap, buy some fresh vegetables and a few delicacies and plan a feast for yourself. Invite a friend. Cooking is best when shared. And clean as you go. Try to keep the kitchen spotless all the way through, with only the serving dishes left to do after you've finished eating. And do them right away.

New clothes, the gym, swimming, sitting in a café relaxing and people-watching, maybe read a good book.

All these things will help you to reverse your direction, and will vastly improve your chances of finding a good job. And, if you can, be picky about the job. Don't take the first thing that comes along (unless it is really right). Learning new skills is also a smart approach -- good idea there.

You can also take advantage of various aids to help you find the right path. There is a lot out there. Of course, you may already be doing many of these things.

I wish you the best in this journey. As I said, you are not alone -- not by a long shot. If you can find others in a similar situation and work to support each other, encouraging growth, that can help, too.

supeergabs_ profile image
Gabriela Muñoz

Charles, thank you so much for your recommendations, it brings tears to my eyes to read them. Now, fortunately, I am doing some activities, every day I feel better. :)

chasm profile image
Charles F. Munat

We are all in this together, Gabriela, even if many of us tend to forget...

noprod profile image

Here is a healing potion as support!

Heal potion

panditapan profile image

aww te envio muchos abrazos y buenas vibras, se que podras lograrlo! Esta bien si te agrego a linkedin para ver si de alguna forma puedo ayudarte? saludos!! (no soy reclutadora pero compartiendo y dandote like puedo darte visibilidad con mis contactos que son como mil reclutadores aqui en México jajajaja)

raibtoffoletto profile image
Raí B. Toffoletto

I think we all been there (or sadly will be) at one point of our lives! You are not alone! It's ok to feel sad and depressed when you have a burnout, time usually helps, but for me the more important step in order to turn the tide, is to put your feet out of your house... go for a walk for 30min every day and will help you to put your your thoughts and yourself together!! Sending you good vibes and wishing you well.

Saludos! Vas ver que pronto encuentras un nuevo trabajo y de espacio la vida va mejorando 🙂

supeergabs_ profile image
Gabriela Muñoz

Thank you :)

jmau111 profile image

You're very strong. I don't see many posts on the topic, because it's a tough reality in this business.

Another member of DEV described the most challenging part of the job as "a constant threat to your mental health," which is true. Stress can be overwhelming.

The only thing that does not change in this job is change.

supeergabs_ profile image
Gabriela Muñoz

Thank you, I wrote this post help me to recognize that I am vulnerable, It's ok not always people are happy.

krisdover profile image
Kris Dover

Hang in there Gabriela, as long as you have life you have hope. Don't let the things you can't control (like losing your job) weigh you down, but rather take comfort in the little things you can control (like tidying your apartment) and take small steps towards that so it becomes a routine. Please note I'm not qualified to give psychiatric advice, but I'm just saying this as someone whose been there (and everyone's been there) and as someone whose praying your find your way.

supeergabs_ profile image
Gabriela Muñoz

Kris, I really appreciate your recommendations! Every day is better than others! Keep going :)

elias_zon profile image

Thanks for sharing the story. I can feel you. These days, lots of fresh graduates like me have a tough time in my country. Many of them cant even get a job. It's almost the darkest time in job market.

But I hope we could get through this tough time and live a good life.

geminii profile image

Terribly hard to accept and i really understand. I feel the exact same thing few months ago.
3 months on an company, no feedbacks. All is good and finally nothing was good then bye bye …
It’s a sad moment but you will pass it and start new experience soon 💪
Keep it in your head and stay positive 🙏

mbjacket81 profile image
Michael Barton

Always look at one opportunity lost as opening doors for other things. I lost my job after 2 years with a startup last year. It was somewhat of a relief that I wouldn't have to deal with the burnout anymore and I realized that I could finally start working on what I wanted to actually work on. I spent a couple of months job searching and landed an opportunity as a Sr Consultant but in the meantime, I was working on my side hustles which are websites and apps that I developed from scratch. Believe me, there's a lot that you can accomplish without having a full-time job and you can learn from doing Fiverr or Upwork jobs while getting paid to do it so things will get better with time but it's a mind-shift to think positive and realize that you can replace what used to be with something else. Life-change happens and there's a community here that can certainly help you through the difficult times!

jwp profile image
John Peters

All your symptoms are classic signs of depression. Talk to your Dr. About anti-depressants.

Don't drink any alcohol now as it's a depressant. Getting lots of rest is good because you need it now.

I've been through more than 5 layoffs in my 30 year career. The IT industry is unique in that regard. It's a generally unstable industry.

Here's what I learned. Never ever accept a layoff as a judgement of who you are. Use the pain to motivate you in retooling. Focus on getting as many interviews as possible.

Your new full-time job is getting a job. Each interview serves two purposes, one for them and more importantly one for you to see what skills are in high demand. Make a list of top skills needed and start studying the top most request. I would guess it will be cloud certification. As you dive into your study allow the pain to motivate you to get the certification. As your focus changes, the pain will subside. When you get your next new job you'll find a better situation and a pay increase.

Yes IT has very personally offensive practices, but it won't stop any of us in the long term.

marthaelax profile image

Mi recomendación es que, aunque te sientas sin energía, trata de hacer las cosas cotidianas como mantener el apartamento limpio. Mientras más deje que se acumule todo eso, peor será.

Espero logres conseguir un nuevo trabajo y mientras tanto, nunca pares de aprender.

zoreankit profile image
Ankit Zore • Edited

I would recommend you to read Power of subconscious mind

It's very good book which will encourage you and help you discover your hidden strength.

Don't be disheartened by minor setbacks in life, better and awesome things are coming down the line stay positive cheers🍻 😊

rociogonzalezt9 profile image

Happy that life has given me the opportunity to meet you, you are a very interesting person, you have a lot of potential and I understand a lot of what you are going through, I hug you, I admire you and here I am to send you a lot of positive energy and share my experience. All in the correct time happen, one step at a time. Every day, every experience is a learning experience and all this leads you to be a better version of yourself.

aodagit profile image

Hug you , long time ago , i lost my job too, you know,i try my best to do that job , and i like it , but one day , my leader said ,
you don't need work from tomorrow, i realized that i am fired, i was so sad , can't understand why ,how it can happen,what is the bad things i done, i was droped into a dark, many many days later , i decided to do something,just active myself,and then i started to learn writer code , so now, i became a programmer,a full stack programmer,so don't worry,Gabriela, darkness will pass,light will come.

Timeless DEV post...

Git Concepts I Wish I Knew Years Ago

The most used technology by developers is not Javascript.

It's not Python or HTML.

It hardly even gets mentioned in interviews or listed as a pre-requisite for jobs.

I'm talking about Git and version control of course.

One does not simply learn git