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re: 4 signs your job is beyond repair VIEW POST

FULL DISCUSSION
 

Trust is one of the biggest issues for me. A lot of companies give off a vibe that they don't trust their employees. I see this a lot with remote work, where it is not offered/offered once a week maximum because they don't trust you to be doing work without seeing you in a cube (where you might be browsing Hacker News all day anyways!)

Micromanagement turns me off a lot. I had a manager who constantly questioned everything I did and demanded precise estimates and wouldn't end the conversation until I committed to an estimate. It was really stressful, sometimes with tasks you need to experiment a bit before you can say how long it will probably take to complete. His questioning made me more and more anxious and uncomfortable and I'd finally just break down and say what he wanted me to say so he would shut up and I could work.

If there is lots of drama in the workplace, that's a huge red flag for me as well. When coworkers use passive-aggressive behavior instead of trying to come to a common level of understanding or talk it through like adults, I'm out. We're a team, if you're keeping score or reminding me of every time I have been wrong before, there's no way we can act as a team and trust each other.

I was briefly an EMT and you basically trusted your partner with your life. There were certain people I couldn't work with because we had conflicting values. A lot of paramedics were very burnt out and just wanted to get off scene so they could take another nap, but I wanted to help out and practice compassion and at least give the person resources to city agencies who can help them with their problems since we couldn't. I'm not going to possibly get seriously injured if I don't trust my coworkers, but that attitude has been conditioned in me pretty well.

 

Thank you for your wonderfully thoughtful response. Yes, I think trust and respect is absolutely key to a happy workplace.

Micromanagement turns me off a lot. I had a manager who constantly questioned everything I did and demanded precise estimates and wouldn't end the conversation until I committed to an estimate.

Yea, I'm not really sure why managers continue to think estimates work when most of the happy developers have realized that you can't know what you don't know. There's a lot of joy that can come from not knowing.

Another great point of yours:

trying to come to a common level of understanding or talk it through like adults

It's wonderful that you try to speak to the person and try to deescalate the situation. Too many people just let the difficult environment stay tense. I love this quote from Thich Nhat Hanh:

“To love our enemy is impossible. The moment we understand our enemy, we feel compassion towards him or her, and he or she is no longer our enemy.” ~ Thich Nhat Hanh

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