Indeed, that's really hypocrite when someone else wants more from you then he'd do...
I agree it's hard to find a balance. I think for certain things team rules can work. Like for commit messages.
I imagine that most people would agree that meaningful commit messages are helpful, so they would not vote against such a rule at a team meeting. Then it "only" has to be enforced, and when you do so,
you don't have to push choices and values, you only try to enforce the rules they accepted.
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