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Don't let embarrassment in the face of feedback devolve into defensiveness (100 Bytes Of Wisdom: Day 61)

Don't let embarrassment in the face of feedback devolve into defensiveness

Sometimes when you get feedback, you can feel quite embarrassed quite quickly. What do you mean I've been doing it wrong this whole time? Oh gosh I didn't know that's how it looked?

The problem is when this devolves into defensiveness. You start to doubt the feedback in order to prevent further embarrassment. Its a common trap but it's a terrible terrible response to the situation. What you should do is take that embarrassment energy and channel into a few days of quiet reflection. From this reflection you should come up with some concrete actions to fix your behaviour and satisfy the feedback.

What I'm trying to say is just breathe!

Heads up: As with any terse bit of advice, there will be exceptions of course, and subtleties and nuance that can't possibly be captured in a Byte of Wisdom. This has been what I've experienced, I'd love to hear yours in the comments too!

You can catch up with all the other bytes at http://bytesofwisdom.com/

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