Luck is a funny thing. Sometimes you have it. Sometimes you don't. And even sometimes when you don't have you are still luckier than others. Isn't that still luck?
It is March. One year since the quarantine started. I remember how excited I was for my yearly Spring Training trip to Arizona when everything shut down. If I was traveling one week earlier, I would have made it. My brother did and posted some great happy pics with his friends. I love that for him, but...
Move forward to June and I start to feel sick. I knew it couldn't be covid since I hadn't been anywhere. Well, to the grocery store but that was with a mask, washing hands and all the things.
Still sick two weeks later, the doctor sent me for a covid test. I'd've lost a lot of money if anyone bet me on that as it was positive.
There starts:
- three months of a fever
- problems breathing
- no energy - really no energy, I could barely get out of bed
- pain - some severe - in all parts of my body
- eye problems
- head fog and memory challenges - how do you go from remembering most things to not remembering words or what someone just said? I never related more to "Squirrel!" in my life.
And the list goes on and on, with multiple infections, cough, insomnia, losing my voice, and oh so much more. Never has the question "How are you feeling?" been so hard to answer? I have become a living game of whack-a-mole!
Coming back to luck, even though I am still extremely limited and new symptoms keep appearing, I still feel luckier than many. Who else gets to go to a special doctors area where they dress as if I am a leper!
I have my moments where I allow myself a little pity party but then I have to shake it off.
Covid doesn't define me. I am lucky I am here. I have more empathy and understanding for others who are suffering from things like memory loss. I will get better and I will just keep on this journey one step (or crawl, depending on the day) at a time.
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