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Joel Bennett
Joel Bennett

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Tales from the Scrum Dungeon

What is the scrum dungeon, dare you ask? It's a dark place. A place without windows, where sunlight never shines, where laughter is never heard, and where everything is a shade of gray. Literally.

At a previous job, the building layout was a bit... odd. After some renovations, a room that was tucked back into one of corners had no windows, grey carpet, and a heavy steel door. It had no ethernet jack in the wall, and poor Wi-Fi coverage. Because of its odd location and limited utility, no one wanted to use it as an office. It remained mostly unused, except for the rare scrum meeting when no other rooms were available. Because of this, it got nicknamed the "scrum dungeon".

In my youth, there was a Saturday morning cartoon called "Tales from the Crypt Keeper". A haggardly looking character who was the maintainer of a crypt would tell a story of woe or danger to serve as a warning to children. I may not be that ancient, but I've seen my fair share of software development woes that perhaps it is time for me to share them. Not to ridicule those involved, but to serve as warning to others. Perhaps my tales can help prevent someone else avoid such dangers and suffer a kinder fate.

These are my tails from the Scrum Dungeon.

The Certification With a Swear In It

The User Who Could Consistently Break the App

The Safety Dialog

Coyotes

Max Lines

Leprosy As A Service

Reset your @*@&ing password

High Precision Rock Throwing

Cars and Deer

The Dangerous Mr. O'Conner

The Really Expensive Whiteboard

(More to come soon...)

Welcome to the Scrum Dungeon

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