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Emmanuel Os
Emmanuel Os

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Tech is not for me, I am a fraud: A Journey of Growth and Overcoming Imposter Syndrome

In 2019, I embarked on a journey into the world of tech, fueled by excitement and ambition. I devoured tutorials, mimicking code and building basic projects. Looking back, it was a charade, a performance of competence built on shaky foundations. I convinced myself I was good, even landing a job as a Frontend developer using Angular. But the truth soon came crashing down. I was lost, overwhelmed, and ultimately, a failure.

The weight of my imposter syndrome crushed me. "Tech is not for me," I whispered, the words echoing in the hollow chamber of my self-doubt. Shame and fear became my companions, leading me to a period of stagnation and disillusionment.

But amidst the darkness, a spark of hope flickered. In 2021, I decided to rebuild, not just my skills, but myself. I started from scratch, embracing the fundamentals with humility. I built small projects, honing my craft and rediscovering the joy of creation. I found solace in online communities and learning platforms, connecting with others who shared my struggles and triumphs.

The path wasn't easy. There were countless setbacks, moments of frustration, and nights spent battling self-doubt. But with each challenge, I grew stronger, my resilience forged in the fires of adversity. I began taking on small freelance projects, applying my knowledge to real-world problems.

In 2022, I enrolled in a software engineering school, surrounding myself with fellow aspiring developers and mentors who believed in me. This environment fostered my growth, pushing me beyond my comfort zone and helping me unlock my potential. My hard work and dedication paid off, leading to opportunities I never dreamed possible.

Today, I stand as a Software Engineer at C80 Limited, a testament to the power of perseverance and self-belief. My journey has been a rollercoaster of emotions, a dance between hope and despair, success and failure. But through it all, I have learned that the most important battles are fought within, against the demons of self-doubt and fear.

The tech industry is not for the faint of heart. It demands constant learning, adaptation, and a relentless pursuit of excellence. But for those who dare to dream and have the courage to face their fears, the rewards are immeasurable.

My journey is far from over. I continue to explore new horizons, venturing into the realm of mobile development and embracing the challenge of learning a new backend language, GoLang. The future beckons, and I face it with open arms, ready to learn, grow, and contribute to the ever-evolving world of technology.

To those struggling with similar doubts, I say this: you are not alone. Imposter syndrome is a common enemy, but it can be overcome. Embrace the challenges, learn from your mistakes, and never stop believing in yourself. Your journey may be different, but the destination – a fulfilling career and a life filled with purpose – is within your reach. So, take that first step, keep learning, keep growing, and never give up on your dream.

Top comments (14)

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andrewjensentech profile image
Andrew Jensen

If you look at the career path of developers it's quite amusing.

Year 0 to 2:
You are completely useless at development. You have a god complex because you have the power of creation but you can't back it up with skill yet.

Year 3 - 5
You still have a god complex but now you're able to write code that's legible and works... mostly...

Year 5-7
You're finally doing amazing things. the god complex has disappeared and you no longer act smart.

Year 7-15
You're on a constant path to challenge yourself, but it's getting harder to find challenges. You scour new technologies, learn to leverage tech in remarkable ways and do things that the new young demi gods look at and go "he's insane"

Year 15+
It's time to give back, so you try to guide the younger devs. but those god complexes are painful.

The above is simply a random view and certainly doesn't apply to everyone. However, if anything, it is worth noting that no two developers are equal. Everyone has their path that they walk and they learn different things over time.

It's easy to compare and feel like you don't belong... your unique experiences will define you as a developer so embrace them. Even the bad.

There is no right path, only one filled with challenges.

Lastly, to all you devs out there.... if you go through a day in your comfort zone, you've learned nothing! Challenge yourself, challenge those around you and develop a thirst for knowledge.

Do that every day, and you'll be fine...

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manchicken profile image
Mike Stemle

I wish I could say have had similar success, but I haven’t. The contemporary myth of the 10x developer is also making this sort of problem worse.

We shouldn’t have to dedicate our lives to making someone else—who is already quite wealthy—richer to feel worthy, valued, or valuable.

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akoskm profile image
Akos

You can always work for yourself; not all bosses/companies are the same.

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manchicken profile image
Mike Stemle

That’s hardly a rebuttal. No thank you.

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akoskm profile image
Akos

Didn't mean it as a rebuttal. Millions of people make a comfortable living, and I'm sure they know someone above them is making even bigger bucks. But I don't think that's what we should focus on.

There are other ways to make a good living from tech. I mentioned the above two because I work on my terms and have a couple of employees.

I'm sure there's a way for you to function in tech.

Feel free to hit me up with questions if you have any. 🙂

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manchicken profile image
Mike Stemle

I’m sorry, I completely misread your first comment.

There are ways for folks to function in tech who have difficulties, it’s just not easy.

Tech is a discipline where we pretend we can all have fun and learn and be creative, but the business side is as ruthless as any other. At the end of the day, those of us who build a profession are paid laborers; a commodity to be bought at the lowest price.

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akoskm profile image
Akos

It is not easy. 💯

I've spent a month researching, reading, and writing cold messages to finally get into a call today with a big company in a specific engineering field we might work with.
It was hard, and I sometimes thought, "This doesn't make sense.".
But when I think about the alternative, which is what you said, I think this was well worth my time.

Software development is not all fun and dance, and I haven't had a thread this long on blogging platforms for years. Thanks Mike 🤝

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ranjancse profile image
Ranjan Dailata • Edited

You are absolutely right about the Imposter syndrome, constant learning and facing all the challenges as a software engineer is common.

There's always a risk and the reward will be paid based upon the contribution one does. Hence, it's mandatory for one to upskill, work hard and gain as much knowledge to keep up to date in the market to survive.

Remember, there's nothing impossible, anything can be learned or unlearned, it's all life's lesson that one needs to undergo. However, please remember that nothing in this world is permanent.

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eworld profile image
Emmanuel Os

Yes i will, keep learning and growing
Nothing in this world is permanent. Thank you for this words @ranjancse

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darius410 profile image
Darius

Good job on beating imposter syndrome! I always say if you ever get doubtful of yourself think back to the first time you made hello world appear on screen.It will remind you of what made you feel good about creating something in the first place.Stay motivated!

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eworld profile image
Emmanuel Os

Sure i will
Thank you @darius410

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akoskm profile image
Akos

Congrats, Emmanuel, for conquering your thoughts! 💪

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eworld profile image
Emmanuel Os

thank you so much @akoskm