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#staythefuckhome but still live your life to the fullest

dvddpl profile image Davide de Paolis Updated on ・3 min read

There's nothing to mourn about death any more than there is to mourn about the growing of a flower. What is terrible is not death but the lives people live or don't live up until their death. They don't honor their own lives, they piss on their lives. They shit them away. Dumb fuckers. They concentrate too much on fucking, movies, money, family, fucking. Their minds are full of cotton. They swallow God without thinking, they swallow country without thinking. Soon they forget how to think, they let others think for them. Their brains are stuffed with cotton. They look ugly, they talk ugly, they walk ugly. Play them the great music of the centuries and they can't hear it. Most people's deaths are a sham. There's nothing left to die
Charles Bukowski

I just don´t like people

During these quarantine days, I have been cleaning up some stuff, both real and digital. I ended up in an old post from June 2008 from one of my first blogs, where I was reviewing Charles Bukowski´s book "The captain is out to lunch".

Even if without all the scorn and resentment that Bukowski´s words bring with them, I started reflecting on how some people are not only, not taking advantage of this situation of social distancing and quarantine, but really throwing their life away in boredom and mindless activities.

Covid19 hit Italy way before Germany so I could experience the lockdown tales directly from my relatives and friends when we could still go to concerts, visit the gym or simply take strolls. And what everyone was saying was:

Thank God we are all fine, but it is hard to simply let another day pass, and what we do is just stay home and get bored.


Now that I have been home with my wife - both working remote - and kids - both with homeschooling / online courses - for 4 weeks, I still do not fully understand their complaints.

Don´t get me wrong. It is tough. If you are working it could be tough to find the balance between work and free time, if you have to entertain small kids, or help the older ones with homework, or with homeschooling, it could be challenging and time-consuming. If you are not working (being laid off, or forced to take unpaid leave) it might be scary thinking about your financial future. If you have a very small apartment and not even a small balcony it could be suffocating.

But... most people I was speaking to where not in such conditions.
They were home, with their family, within a certain degree of financial safety, with enough room at home for everyone.

Nevertheless, they spent every single day cooking and baking ( which is actually a very good activity to do with the entire family ), eating, drinking alcohol, smoking, watching and doing challenges on TikTok and binge-watching Netflix.

binge watching

What´s weird in our case is that we actually have more time - since we are not going out, no gym, no courses, no commuting, no shopping - but I feel we have even less than before, so many are the things I want to do at home.
The quarantine can be suffocating and kill motivation, but there are lots of possibilities yet. Lots of things to do, train, study, renovate, learn something you always wanted to learn, try yoga, meditation, try writing poetry, open a blog, build a small balcony-veggie garden, go through all old boxes ( or folders on your old hard drive) of photos, and make all those memories and moments come back to life.

Even TikTok and Instagram can be a great source of creativity actually, but you need to be ready to grasp them and make it yours, not just consume them passively and forward them to your contacts.

True, some things might require spending some money buying stuff online, or enough space, which many don't have, but there are still lot's of opportunities and most of them are nearly free (and anyway less than one pack of cigarettes and a bottle of wine every day).

But the thing we normally lack the most is time, and right now, we have a lot of it. Let´s not waste it.

Do not waste your time. do not waste your life.

Everyone say opportunities are out there, in this case, are in there, exactly at your place.

Stay home, stay safe.

live your best life

Discussion (4)

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janmpeterka profile image
Jan Peterka (he/him)

Nice article!
I agree that it's possible to use time to do something good, useful, worthwhile.
However, from tone of your article it seems to me like it's easy, and I don't think it is. For most of us, it's more or less stressful situation. It's natural (in my opinion) that it's harder to concentrate, to find a will to work, easy to fall into boredom, even depression. Also, some of the habits we build to help us be happier and more productive may be falling apart because they were weaved into our normal life order.
It's important to realize we cannot just "wait" until it's over (because it may take a really long time too), but it's also important to be okay with not being so productive as one normally is.

P.S.: Small typo there - I expect mediation should be meditation (however, for those living with other people in small space, mediation may be also new thing to try).

dvddpl profile image
Davide de Paolis Author

thanks for you comment, and for pointing out the typo. already fixed.

yes I know the situation is not easy. for some it's less difficult, for some other almost unbearable. and not being able to go out, meet in person with others, not having your routine anymore can lead to boredom, lack of motivation and as you said even depression.
but depression aside ( I perfectly know you can't go to a depressed person locked in his dark room and tell them "come on, go out ! it's sunny - at least try to be happy") I am really referring to all those ( and I can count many among my lifelong friends ) that were always complaining not having the time to do what they want, and now that they have it, they complain they don't know what to do.
and of course, motivation plays a big role here - my lazy side often tells me

why are you training pull-ups and push-ups if you can't go climbing anyway
and my discipline side immediately replies
exactly because I want to be fit and strong as soon as i can again!
I don't always listen to it, but at least I try :-)

sandordargo profile image
Sandor Dargo

Thanks for your article, Davide. I am fond of your approach.

I still read, listen to people who complain about boredom, etc. With kids at home, you have less time than otherwise. But even they (2 and 4 years old) are less interrupting than the constantly chatting/passing by people of an open office.

Also, I think these are very good moments to start reading about/practicing Stoicism. There is no event out there that is stressful. Our reaction can be stress, but that's something in our control - with practice. I don't say it's easy, but it's not rocket science either.

dvddpl profile image
Davide de Paolis Author

thanks for the wise and calm words.
yes, it is indeed hard sometimes. but we all need some discipline and to put some effort into what we do or want to do. I also listen and try to understand other people feelings and struggles , but often it makes me so mad - i still probably have to learn to articulate my thoughts in a more proactive way for the reader (i guess my Italian blood takes over here.. :-) )