Photo by Jens Johnsson on Unsplash
Note: I originally put this article together as a resource for developers joining their first remote developer team at Chingu. After a few years and thousands of remote developer collaborations launched, I remain convinced that soft skills are grossly underestimated. I hope you find this valuable.
Your Skills Stack should not be limited to just technical skills.
- Don’t criticize, condemn, or complain.
- Give honest and sincere appreciation.
- Arouse in the other person an eager need or want.
- Become genuinely interested in other people.
- Smile.[emojis work just as well]
- Remember that a person’s name is to that person the sweetest and most important sound in any language.
- Be a good listener. Encourage others to talk about themselves.
- Talk in terms of the other person’s interests.
- Make the other person feel important — and do it sincerely.
- The only way to get the best of an argument is to avoid it.
- Show respect for other person’s opinions. Never say, “You’re wrong.”
- If you are wrong, admit it quickly and emphatically.
- Begin in a friendly way.
- Get the other person saying “yes, yes” immediately.
- Let the other person do a a great deal of the talking.
- Let the other person feel that the idea is his or hers.
- Try honestly to see things from the other persons point of view.
- Be sympathetic with the other person’s ideas and desires.
- Appeal to the other nobler motives.
- Dramatize your ideas.
- Throw down a challenge.
- Begin with praise and honest appreciation.
- Call attention to people’s mistakes indirectly.
- Talk about your own mistakes before criticizing the other person.
- Ask questions instead of giving direct orders.
- Let the other person save face.
- Praise the slightest improvement and praise every improvement. Be “hearty in your appreciation and lavish in your praise.”
- Give the other person a fine reputation to live up to.
- Use encouragement. Make the fault seem easy to correct.
- Make the other person happy about doing the thing you suggest.
All the above are Carnegie principles.