Cover image alt: Header reading the this blog post's title. The background is a large lecture hall with light brown, wooden chairs and white walls.
This was originally posted on my personal blog site.
Trigger Warning: violence against women
My Twitter mentions exploded today over tweets I made about misogynistic Udemy course that has (thankfully) been removed from the site. This post is about the course of events from the first tweet I saw, to the end of a day full of problematic replies and discoveries of even more courses that should be removed. I'll break the content up as much as possible.
Table of Contents
- The First Tweet
- The Course & Its Issues
- Problematic Replies and Retweets
- More Courses To Remove
- What You Can Do
The First Tweet
I saw the first tweet about this course from Twitter user @ryzokuken. The course is titled: "How to Hack a Girl: The Real Life Version." The link preview description says, "Make Her A Woman Be Attracted to You By Hacking Her Brain!" (ow, the grammar.)
I tweeted about it around midnight and included a screenshot of the course's basic information. Aside from the title and description mentioned above, it also showed:
- A 2.9 / 5 star rating from 36 reviews
- Quantity of 3,231 students enrolled since May 2019
- The instructor's name: Pedro Planas
- A 45% off price of \$10.99, and 5 hours remaining at that price
My tweet has been seen tens of thousands of times. Hundreds liked it. Obviously I'm not the only person who finds it problematic.
The Course & Its Issues
First of all, women are not hardware or software and therefore cannot be hacked. We are human beings. Second of all, you can't make women be attracted to you if they don't want to be. That's called entitlement and women are disproportionately harassed, assaulted, and even murdered because they reject men who think they're entitled to our bodies and attention. Before you try to debate this statement with me, here's JUST FIVE articles you should read:
- Women share the worst ways men reacted after they rejected them
- ‘Rejection Killings’ Need to Be Tracked
- The Toronto Van Attack Suspect Was Obsessed With Rejection From Women. He Is Not Alone Among Violent Men
- MEN ARE KILLING THOUSANDS OF WOMEN A YEAR FOR SAYING NO
- 20 Horrifying Stories That Explain Why Women Are Afraid Of Turning Down Men
The original thread from that last bullet point is no longer up, but you can take a look at these quote tweets from the first tweet in the thread.
Let's also take a look at the course description:
"Have you ever felt like she doesn't pay attention to you and she ends up being with the bad guy while you are left behind hopeless? If this is your case, you are just some clicks away to make her be attracted to you and so you end up being the one who ends up with her. This is a videocourse on how to hack a girl's brain by understanding how a woman thinks, how to improve your overall appealing and science-based pshycological tricks that will make you be awesome at getting her to like you!"
All emphasis, gross misspellings, and horrid grammar are by the author of the description.
Sigh. There's so much to unpack.
Problematic Replies and Retweets
Here's a bunch of awful replies and retweets sorted into fun little categories.
Whataboutism
Annoying, non-jokes
Mansplaining
Just... no
Freedom of Speech
More Courses To Remove
This isn't the first time Udemy has had to remove courses. Twitter user @ohdaeni tweeted out a series of problematic courses 10 months ago:
- "How to Exit the Friendzone (Or Avoid Falling into it)"
- "Dating For Men - How to Escape The Friendzone!"
- "Crucial Dating Advice For Lovable Guys" (also mentions the friendzone)
- "How To Get The Girl - Dating For Men" (MORE FRIENDZONE GARBAGE)
Luckily, Udemy removed them and others by the same instructors. But why do they keep letting this happen? Why don't they have a review and approval process for all courses attempting to be added?
Below are some courses I found today with just minutes of searching, also sorted into fun categories.
Ableism
- "The secret of how I've seen Over 2500 Deaf and Mute Healed" (impossible, but OK)
- "Hypnosis - Improve Your Hearing Using Self Hypnosis" (also impossible, but whatever)
- Welcoming disabled colleagues and customers with confidence (disabled people are not things to "deal" with, but thanks)
Sexism
Just go read the descriptions. Have a bucket nearby you can vomit into.
- "Make Women Fall In Love With You. (The Secret To Seduction) "
- "How to Attract the Perfect Man & Make Him Love You Forever "
- "Become Irresistible: The Complete Guide to Attract The Man"
- "Meet & Attract Women - Learn How Today"
What You Can Do
Udemy wants you to send them an email.
I want you to flood their mentions.
Pressure them into making change. Report awful courses. It's 2019, we have lots of people wanting to write software to filter this kind of crap, and there's no excuse for exposing paying customers to danger. Notice how Udemy never made a public tweet about this? They want to keep it quiet. Don't let them.
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Top comments (36)
That doesn't really answer the question at all. There are a lot of awful things out there, but this isn't the kind of thing that helps anyone develop.
Udemy does not even do some sort of vetting process to see if the video uploader is genuine. I see a lot of videos being copied from youtube. Which is so wrong for those channel creators.
It's sad! Udemy needs to do WAY better.
As any dev and ops should now, housekeeping is needed. In our project, on our server, in our database etc... We track any code smell, any misuse of variable name, any bug, any old revision that should have been stopped long ago, we try to get rid as much useless data as possible. I see now reason why our community should not have any use of housekeeping. I do not wish to see any sexist thought or any racial division in tech community for a dev is a dev. As such, content promoting that you could "hack a woman brain" is first forbidden by alot of laws as manipulation is not really a legal thing, second why a woman brain? are they more easier? Those kind of idea are just brought by the title, I let you imagine the rest of the course. Honestly, I would agree with any course called "how to find your codemate, or how to find the best match for pair programming" but not how "I can with my super programming power hijack the brain of this girl". That reductive for the women and for us as developer.
At least I believe.
On a side note, this kind of content seems appropriate since dev.to put up "Yet she coded" (I believe it the name of the post series? I may have it wrong) and as such position itself on the non discrimination of gender in tech related topic.
One thing I'd love to see Udemy get better at is checking the quality of the captioning their instructors slap on their courses. Some of it is so, so awful. I've complained to Udemy about it but the general gist of their response was, 'hey at least it's captioned!'. Well ... it kinda defeats the point if you can't understand the captioning in the first place!
So, yeah this doesn't surprise me in the least.
This can't be simplified to some people being upset about dating courses. It's not a dating course. It's a course about how to manipulate women and perpetuates the mentality that men are entitled to women's bodies and attention. I've said multiple times: A LOT of devs use Udemy. But I'm done repeating myself just because you disagree about the need to alert folks to what kind of danger Udemy can be.
Yeah, actually. People love that shit! Check out this post I wrote that has almost 100 reactions and over 1500 views:
How I Keep Coding When I'm Low on Spoons
Ashlee Boyer ・ Sep 3 ・ 5 min read
You have been here for less than a month. I encourage you to explore this site a little bit more. The content goes far beyond technical topics.
So I should expect to be attacked every time for sharing an opinion on a post. New-comers it. Got it.
"Dating" is an over-simplification I suppose but it was in quotes (meaning that isn't really the true subject), but even that isn't the point. You still haven't answered my question. How is this related to developers/designers? How is this helpful? You offer no alternatives or ideas for bettering the situation. Just bashing a platform (for valid reasons, sure). I just don't see the value in it for a dev community. I don't come here to be an army to attack someone else doing terrible stuff. Why don't we attack YouTube because devs can no longer make money on there because of their weird new rules? This site isn't about that. It isn't useful or helpful.
I don't appreciate being attacked for my opinion as stated either.
Have you read the code of conduct here? "Gracefully accepting constructive criticism" and "Focusing on what is best for the community."
This kind of content valuable to me, it's valuable to Ashlee, it's valuable to a whole heck of a lot of women developers who learned things on Udemy. If they allow this sort of stuff onto the site, what's the quality of the tech courses I've taken?
And no one is attacking you.
Yes it is clear that udemy does not do proper house keeping. I had this few days before. twitter.com/baskarmib/status/11726...
Public speaking, applying to jobs, and daily productivity are all related to development, I'd say intrinsically. Why a platform sucks by offering "dating" courses is not at all relevant. Unless dating becomes something you do as part of the development lifecycle (you train an AI on your bad dates perhaps) then it doesn't make sense. I could talk about how YouTube sucks right now or how twitter is full of hate, and though I -- as a developer -- use them for development things, it isn't very helpful or useful for the majority of people here on a DEV site to talk about those platforms without at least mentioning that I am using them as a dev and why it matters to devs/designers. It just seems like pointing out that Udemy has quality issues and scumbag losers on it is suited more toward a more general audience.
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