As much as I love chatting with my manager, sometimes I worry that I walk into our weekly one-on-ones woefully underprepared. My question in the discussion title says it all, but here are some related questions that I have about one-on-ones:
What subjects are typically discussed during one-on-ones?
What are your goals going into a one-on-one meeting?
What can I β a new full-time software engineer β do to get the most out of my one-on-ones?
I'd love to hear about any and all of your experiences. Thank you!
Top comments (15)
A one-on-one is a time for you to talk to your manager about whatever is on your mind. Wins, concerns, career development, your cat, your hobbies, something that is bothering you at work, ideas (even crazy ones), anything! If it is important to you at that moment, and you have a good manager, then it is a good topic. At least, thatβs how I see it. Different managers might have different philosophies, so it is good to check with them.
If one day you have nothing to talk about, and your manager doesnβt either, you can ask to cancel for that day, especially if you already had a chance to talk not too long ago.
It's really up to you and your manager, but I think it's nice to have a running list of topics that I update during the week, and then I make sure to bring them all up at my weekly 1-1s. With my current manager, it's mostly "how is work going?" and "is there anything I want to be more involved in?". My job (SDET) is pretty self-directed so my goals are to share what I'm thinking about, what's challenging me this week, and any feedback I have for him specifically or for our whole team.
With other managers, it can be anything from a conversation over slack to a "lets go for a walk around san francisco and talk about our lives", but it's generally still focused on those two questions - how are things going and what do I want to do next.
I think this really depends on the manager. My 1:1s tend to be more personal, where I want to know about your general well-being, both at work and at home. This is also the time where I'm trying to figure out what each individual needs: how we can be more supportive, facilitate effective communication, and eliminate bottlenecks. These are pretty typical questions I'll ask:
We all work out of one room so there isn't much 'water cooler' time. I view 1:1s as an opportunity to catch up and don't really expect anyone to be 'prepared' with anything.
At my company, we start off with a template for 1:1s (but people can customize it as they see fit). This is the structure that I've been using with my manager:
I've heard some people go to these 1:1s without anything prepared, but I think it's best to treat it like a real meeting and have all of your bullet points prepared so that you can make the most of your time with your manager.
I think frameworks like this make sense. That way there's less mental overhead with coming up with things to say. Whatever you need to say has a good chance at coming out through this.
This an excellent framework!I am going to propose this approach to my new manager.
Thanks for sharing
this framework seems super helpful
I've come from both sides of the coin. My last job I was a senior developer turned Group Leader. At one point I had monthly 1:1 with 12 direct reports. I tailored my conversations to the individuals. Although I was much like Jess Lee, some people didn't want to speak of things outside of the workplace.
Normal work-related questions:
Current 1:1 - I'm a developer again (Here are things I'm asked and also say)
So I think it depends on what you want from your 1:1s. Do you want your 1:1s to be more formal, informal, etc.? What is your career goal with the 1:1s and plan accordingly. Personally, I like to have a personal report and enjoy a boss who isn't a micro-manager, but that's me.
I conduct regular 1-1s with my teams and here are some ideas specifically for a new full-time software engineer:
1) What are your general expectations of me?
It's surprising how many people come to work not knowing what they are being evaluated on at the end of the year. Closing your stories before the end of the sprint is often only a small part of what you're expected to do.
Hope this helps!
I'm a manager, and I use an adapted version of this framework with my reports. My one-on-ones with my manager tend to be a bit looser and free-form though, and sometimes I come to them fairly unprepared!
I can give you my practical experience - I have been reporting to my manager for almost 3 years now, and I have had 1 person report to me for about a year.
At the beginning of my employment - I would ask my manager for feedback about my work - specific issues - say something took too long or if I found something odd - I'd discuss that.
Over time, we have come to know each other better - I generally don't have as many performance related questions - although every 2 or 3 months, I do check in with the general direction of both the project and my work - so that I don't become complacent.
We do discuss family and other things that are going on in our lives - but that is generally kept at a high level.
The person reporting to me is also similar - only roles reversed.
Feel free to ask if you have specific questions.
First and foremost, you should feel at liberty to ask your manager if there's anything more you can do to be prepared.
Something you might have found already is that there tend to be better resources out there for being a manager than for being managed. As it turns out, reading resources for becoming a better manager will help you become a better direct report. :)
You'll have no trouble finding posts about how to conduct good 1-on-1 meetings from a manager's perspective. A popular one is The Update, The Vent, and The Disaster. 18F also has a nice writeup in their handbook. And The Manager's Path is a very accessible primer on engineering management. Even though these are resources meant for managers to read, I bet you'll find them very helpful.
One final note, to actually give you a specific answer:
In addition to their other roles, consider also treating your manager as a general career counselor. They might be ideally suited to this role, since they know your skills and qualities so intimately. If you want to broaden your skill set to include front-end development, they can discuss options with you. If your long term goal is to be a manager yourself, they can talk through that path with you and help you compare it to a path where you stay primarily in development.
We have some set topics that we talk about every time just to get a sense for how things are going over timeβfor example, some things we have on our regular schedule are what I feel like I'm wasting time on, if there's any sticking points in the dev process or if things are going well, what my favorite projects have been, and so on.
I've also brought up questions about how I can work on professional advancement within the company, ideas I've had to improve the dev process, and thoughts about the kinds of technologies/types of projects I'd like the chance to work on if they come up.
It might be useful to keep a notes file of things you'd like to talk about in a 1:1 so that none of those thoughts get lost when it actually comes time to have the meeting? It might also be worth just asking your manager what kinds of things they're interested in hearing about in advance, since every manager can be different on that. At our office we use this plugin for slack called "Good Talk" or something similar to collaboratively generate our list of topics, which I think has worked pretty well and allows me to get a sense of the agenda in advance.