// , “It is not so important to be serious as it is to be serious about the important things. The monkey wears an expression of seriousness... but the monkey is serious because he itches."(No/No)
This is unfortunate to hear. I've worked for non-profits before, and often the ones that do the most don't end up with the most funding. And many of the Christians I know will give others the benefit of the doubt not only as a matter of tact, but as part of a religious inclination, too.
It's interesting that you characterized his words as "deceptions," rather than outright lies. This is "paltering."
In the world of business and negotiation, paltering is a means of using ‘technically true’ information to get a better deal.
--Tracy Schorn
Seems like you ran into what Dr. Simon would call a "manipulative person."
From what you posted here, this asshole went through two of the three basic affects of manipulation by manipulative people:
Rage
...he was enraged that I'd proposed something without getting his permission first (although he'd refused to take my or the director's calls).
literally threw a kicking-and-screaming-tantrum during the board meeting
Self Pity
he played the "I feel so dishonored" card (it was a Christian organization)
Charm
Did you notice, at any phase, this developer "turning on the charm" at some point?
For you and for anyone who would like to recognize, and hope to avoid, a tale like the above, I recommend the following book Dr. Simon:
I was not allowed to reach out to the clients because my employment contract had a few clauses.
As to the psychological assessment...oh, yes, I identified him as a manipulator just prior to that meeting, and a possible borderline sociopath, at the time. (I've got a communication background with a strong psych interest). Unfortunately for him, I not only have a radar for manipulators, but a looooong history of dismantling their machinations.
// , “It is not so important to be serious as it is to be serious about the important things. The monkey wears an expression of seriousness... but the monkey is serious because he itches."(No/No)
This is unfortunate to hear. I've worked for non-profits before, and often the ones that do the most don't end up with the most funding. And many of the Christians I know will give others the benefit of the doubt not only as a matter of tact, but as part of a religious inclination, too.
It's interesting that you characterized his words as "deceptions," rather than outright lies. This is "paltering."
Seems like you ran into what Dr. Simon would call a "manipulative person."
From what you posted here, this asshole went through two of the three basic affects of manipulation by manipulative people:
Did you notice, at any phase, this developer "turning on the charm" at some point?
For you and for anyone who would like to recognize, and hope to avoid, a tale like the above, I recommend the following book Dr. Simon:
amazon.com/In-Sheeps-Clothing-Unde...
By the way, did you ever reach out to those clients?
I was not allowed to reach out to the clients because my employment contract had a few clauses.
As to the psychological assessment...oh, yes, I identified him as a manipulator just prior to that meeting, and a possible borderline sociopath, at the time. (I've got a communication background with a strong psych interest). Unfortunately for him, I not only have a radar for manipulators, but a looooong history of dismantling their machinations.
Keep dismantling, please. Things that might be obvious to the experienced, like yourself, can blindside those of us, ahem, who are not so savvy.