Discussion on: The return statement that keep me silent

Ohhh do I know it.

Following John Cage's rules for students has helped me:

• I found a community where I felt comfortable so I could ask questions
• I trained myself in asking "why" as much as I needed
• I didn't negotiate with trolls - if someone was mean, I'd just block them
• I kept a list of questions and points of confusion so when I talked with someone more experienced, I was ready to pick their brain
• When starting to work with a more experienced dev (a teacher, a dev), I would create an opportunity for us to discuss how I can ask questions and how they can make sure I understand stuff - in this way, this was not a one-way effort but I shared the burden with them

Interesting enough, I still keep these practices in place and they help me so much to skill up quickly and assume new responsibilities at work.

And as a mentor, I help my mentees develop these skills as well:

• I start mentoring a new person by getting to know how they learn (so I can be more active in it) and by setting ground rules (how are you going to ask me for clarification? how will I know that you're lost? can you tell me about a teacher in the past that would help you understand some difficult concepts?)
• I ask them to explain stuff back to me so that:
  • I see if they understand what we talked about
  • they train their technical communication skills
  • this knowledge is active and not passive
• If they are quiet and shy, I challenge them to:
  • ask me at least three questions during/after a session or on a weekly basis
  • ask twitter or stackoverflow (but also I help them proofread it and then like it or even answer it)
• I help them summarize once a month what they've learned because seeing how much you've done and how much you've learned is essential in how you build confidence.

I hope this helps!