I would add a few points to "What men/women could do", since I don't think this is gender only problem. I saw a lot of people being worried about outcome of salary negotiation, it depends on nature of person. Unfortunately people you usually negotiate with are trained for these situations. So basically, you just need to prepare as well.
If you are already employed and looking for raise be prepared to leave. Contact few recruiters, maybe go on few selected interviews, see what the market can offer. Once you see that you cannot achieve the salary you want in current job then leave. I know it's not always about money, but you can always persuade some of your colleagues to go with you ;)
If your not working for a under-budgeted startup having a solid salary raise shouldn't be a problem. If you get arguments like "we cannot afford to give you this kind of money" it usually means "we can, but I was told not to". You shouldn't be personal when it come to this, it's not your bosses money, but money of the company.
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