What's your best software pun?

Molly Struve on September 22, 2019

Yesterday I realized that I had included a great pun in my Cache is King conference talk(besides the title of course!) without even knowing it. ... [Read Full]
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Why was the developer unhappy at their job?

They wanted arrays.


More at dad-jokes repo by the bos man Wes Bos. I chuckle every time I open up that repo.

 
 

Arrays sounds like "a raise". Google translate says "Gehaltserhöhung" means pay raise.

 
 

Oh, I thought maybe it was getting a little too app_le'y ;$

 
 

How JavaScript developer break ups:
I promise to callback later

 

The two hardest problems in software development are:

  1. naming things
  2. cache invalidation
  3. off-by-one errors
 

The best one I have ever heard is

A programmer accused of unreadable code refuses to comment😂😂

 
 

A SQL query goes into a bar, walks up to two tables and asks, "Can I join you?"

Classic 🙂

 

Love this one

 

Here's a couple from the pun king himself, Aaron Patterson.

 

Them: Why do you hit the keys so hard while you're coding?

Me: I'm practicing strong typing!

 

Oh, the typed ruby one is so good 😀

I will use it next time someone brings up typescript!

🤣🤣🤣

 

Not a pun, but from the index of the dBASE III Plus manual back in the '80s (when software came with printed manuals so big you could kill someone with them):

  • Endless Loop: See Loop, Endless ... ...
  • Loop, Endless: See Endless Loop
 

A painful and epic exchange at the last European Ruby Conference, hosted on a cruise ship in Rottermda, Netherlands!











 
 

punch cards. No, not really, I'm not that old.

My personal favorite is probably this Rick Cook quote:

Programming today is a race between software engineers striving to build bigger and better idiot-proof programs, and the universe trying to produce bigger and better idiots. So far, the universe is winning.

 
 

I have to interrupt this thread. I would normally not do this, this is an exception.

 
 

Forking a repo is no cutting edge technology. A branch manager could do it.

 

The chief executive yelled at everyone,
"Functional or not,we have to deliver,the components to our client by tonight, so I don't care how you do it,get a bundler,get it bundled, We(b)pack tonight,we ship".

 
 

Boss: How good are you at PowerPoint?
Me: I Excel at it.
Boss: Was that a Microsoft office pun?
Me: Word.

 

this one

Q: How many Prolog programmers does it take to change a lightbulb?

A: Yes.

this one

!false

It's funny 'cause it's true.

and this one

nock Knock!

An async function

Who's there?

 
 

Data access from multiple threads is knot easy to handle.

 

A digital kanban board isn't as tearable as a bunch of sticky notes.

 

Not a pun, but old-school fun with COBOL:

88 RESOUNDING-CRASH. VALUE “YES”

PERFORM BACKFLIPS-AND-SOMERSAULTS UNTIL RESOUNDING-CRASH

 

I went to Comic Con - sole purpose was to enjoy. Lost my i-card, got Logged out of it.

 

I was so stressed,I drank it all in one gulp.
Grunted for an hour,before it came out of my System.

 

I used to call her babe. She told babeLoves you. Turned out she loved my friend called You. All this time they were transpiling(I mean conspiring) against me.

 

The absolutely best pun is:

"It's not a bug, it's a feature!"

Sadly, however, it's just not funny, because it hurts.

 

Teacher: What is a wild pointer?
Me: Survivor of the wild. 😂

 

I generally don't React,but when I do, I get components.

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