re: How many software developers does it take to screw in a lightbulb? VIEW POST

FULL DISCUSSION
 

We can't know how many resources we need until we:

  1. Write a User Story and add it to the backlog
  2. Resolve dependencies amongst other teams who are providing us with the lightbulb and the socket
  3. Estimate the Story using the Fibonacci point system
  4. Determine capacity for our team members in the upcoming sprint
  5. Pull the story into next sprint and assign specific tasks
 
  1. Get a developer to go get the lightbulb
  2. It's blue, the customer wanted white.
  3. Take the blue light back to get white.
  4. The white light now is too white, customer wants soft white.
  5. Developer screws in the light bulb.
  6. QA tests the light bulb, it doesn't turn on. QA unscrews the lightbulb, places it in a bag, hands it back to the developer and says it's "defective".
  7. Developer tests the lightbulb in their own office and it works. After all, it was a new lightbulb and it worked in their office before.
  8. Developer screws in lightbulb again, it doesn't turn on.
  9. Developer realizes that a previous developer turned off the light switch and cut all of the wires.
  10. Developer quietly weeps in the corner, questioning their life decisions. ...
  11. A new developer walks in and duck-tapes a new socket, wires it up with paperclips and rigs a switch. Light is dimly lit, held together by duck tape and faith, but now no one has anymore bandwidth to fix the original light and everyone moves on.

The End.

 
 
  1. New people buy the bulb for pennies on the dollar.
  2. It gets new team, branding, artwork, photos & interns. Own IG.
  3. Go to trade shows & meetings, events with Bulb 2.0.
  4. Massive growth, rounds, ICO, top 10 on Coinmarketcap. Internet of Bulbs.
  5. 1.0 devs are now working at "Flaming Scooters" really hard to pay basic extortionate-bills & look up from emoji Touch Bar realizing they missed the 1000x but maybe 20% is left.
  6. They invest all savings from Bulb 1.0 into Bulbcoin hodl only to see it fall, knife, deadcat bounce & get delisted. 2.0 team had already cashed out & were working on Doorcoin at the time which saw an unexpected climb as Bulbcoin could be an interesting asset for diversification of their oversized fund.

I was making a joke about the joke. Lol so jokes on you, I suppose.

That tends to happen from time to time. 😅 It's hard making a buck as a dev standup these days. I was attempting, poorly.

Your name proves you have the upper hand this time, Mr Witt.

 

That sounds more like: How many product owners...

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