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Discussion on: How do I handle brutal feedback from colleague?

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ca55idy profile image
ca55idy •

I've experienced similar when I was a junior and to be honest it shaped my career because I knew I never wanted to be that dev. (Turned out the guy riding me, grinded on everyone and I even once witnessed a long term contractor square up to him and only drop his fist when our manager stepped between them as the punch was thrown)

My advice:

  • discuss this colleague's review technique with another colleague who has had their code reviewed by the person, this might sound like I'm saying just moan to an allie but that isn't the case. When I mentioned the review approach, I found it was the guy's standard tone and I then at least knew it wasn't a targeted attack.
  • is there anything constructive in the feedback? If yes then it may just be the colleague's tone. This might be worth a quick informal chat with them, maybe at the coffee machine just say "hey thanks for reviewing PR xx. I'd take the comments on board a little better if they weren't so brutal", in my experience a coffee break is when their guard will be down a little and you can potentially end up in a very constructive conversation about why it feels brutal.
  • unfortunately you are going to come across that one self entitled ass in every company so whilst moving jobs may fix the issue short term, you're likely to encounter it again further down your career line.
  • maybe bring code review styles up at your expertise committee without apportioning any form of blame to anyone if the company has one and whilst you'll find everyone's approach different you will at least find their is a sort of unwritten code of conduct with reviews. Having that CoC reminder in a 'public' forum may trigger your colleague to realise they need to change their approach
  • If it is genuinely unprofessional then hr or at the very least your manager should have knowledge of its occurance. Your manager is more likely to provide immediate action but either way you at least know someone is aware and monitoring ready to action the behaviour.